Looking at this picture makes me hungry. It reminds me of a resturant I used to go to.It was called Poncho and Lefty's. It was one of my favorite resturants ever. I love mexican food!! Basically, i love anything that is hot or spicy. MMmhhh. This is the perfect plate of nachos. Look at the mountains of cheese with spicy jalepeno pepers sinking in. Imagine taking a bite of this scrumptious appetizer. Biting the chip with a loud "chrunch". The cheese melting in your mouth. Jalepeno, like eating a little ball of fire. The cold crisp lettuce and sour cream soothing your mouth like a blast of cold mountain air. The bitter taste of green peppers hits your tounge like a baseball player on steriods. YUCK!!!!!! That is so gross. I'm not hungry anymore.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
#3
Looking at this picture makes me hungry. It reminds me of a resturant I used to go to.It was called Poncho and Lefty's. It was one of my favorite resturants ever. I love mexican food!! Basically, i love anything that is hot or spicy. MMmhhh. This is the perfect plate of nachos. Look at the mountains of cheese with spicy jalepeno pepers sinking in. Imagine taking a bite of this scrumptious appetizer. Biting the chip with a loud "chrunch". The cheese melting in your mouth. Jalepeno, like eating a little ball of fire. The cold crisp lettuce and sour cream soothing your mouth like a blast of cold mountain air. The bitter taste of green peppers hits your tounge like a baseball player on steriods. YUCK!!!!!! That is so gross. I'm not hungry anymore.
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2 comments:
I loved reading this because you focused on taste so much, like the cheese melting in my mouth. I also loved that the lettuce and sour cream were like moutain air. The only thing I would change is make it more of a story that just full of analogies. More nouns and verbs, especially in the first half of the piece.
Your short description was really good. You barelly used any adverbs or adjectives. You had a lot of great sensory detail towards the end. However, the beginning is a little too narrative. I think it's just because you tried to avoid using adjectives and adverbs. You used great similes. They really made me see what you were describing. it was a good example of Show vs. Tell. Good Job! It's funny too.
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